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Competitive Me vs. Balanced Me

 “Somewhere between training for performance and training for enjoyment, I’m still figuring out where I belong.”

Just a couple weeks ago, I signed up for Deka Fit Dubai. No specific training plan. No real preparation. And, if I'm honest, I wasn't even sure what I was getting myself into.

I'd been considering Hyrox Abu Dhabi, but something in me wanted to try something different. So I signed up for Deka pretty late and decided to see what happened.

Over the last few years, my relationship with training has changed a lot. I still train consistently; I run, do cardio, lift weights, strength train… but I'm nowhere near the performance level I was a few years ago and I've stepped away from competing as much as I once did.

These days, I try to enjoy training without always having a target. No specific event. No particular time to chase. Just moving, keeping fit, maintaining a bit of strength, and most importantly enjoying the process.

So, Deka was really about testing the waters. Could I still push myself? Where am I actually at? And could I compete without putting all the pressure on myself that I used to?

The answer, thankfully, was yes.

I definitely wasn't competition-ready in the way I once would have been. There were movements I'd never even done before, sit-up wall balls, for example.

I did a bit of research the night before, worked out roughly what sort of time I should be capable of, and went in with a pretty loose idea of what to expect. And somehow, I was pretty much bang on with the time I'd predicted. Which was a nice reminder that even if I don't feel as fit as I once was, there's still a lot in the tank when I really need to dig deep. Competition does funny things to you, and you can always seem to find another gear.

Of course, competitive me didn't stay quiet for long. The second I saw my splits, I was analysing them; thinking about where I could’ve pushed harder, lost a little time, what I need to work on… That is the eternal battle between competitive me and balanced me.

I can absolutely see myself doing Deka again, and I know that if I actually trained specifically for the movements, worked on my transitions and spent a few weeks preparing properly, I'm pretty sure I could knock a decent chunk off my time.

But...

Do I actually want to?

Do I want to get back on the competition train with structured programming, specific goals, chasing times and training with a purpose?

Or, do I want to keep doing what I've been doing lately?

Enjoying my training.
Mixing things up.
Running when I feel like running.
Lifting because I enjoy lifting.
And occasionally throwing myself into something completely different just to see what happens.

Maybe I don't need to choose just yet.

For now, I'm just glad I said yes to doing Deka. I tried something different. I competed without putting huge expectations on myself. I pushed harder than I thought I might. And, most importantly, I had fun.




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